Interrupt Patterns and Forgive
If you find yourself in negative situations and actually enjoying the drama you should realize that you like the fact that someone else is being blamed so you can avoid blame. Sometimes this isn’t even conscious.
The biggest part of childhood we are trying to learn to deflect so we aren’t in trouble. This is true even in good childhoods.
Another possibility in the same situation is to push a boundary and get in trouble because it is the only time you feel you are getting attention or are in control. Either way, the solution is the same. Interrupt the pattern, forgive the perceptions of the past situation and or the people who didn’t protect your situation. Make an outcome or goal to chase. Then rehearse the new attitudes and skills until they are automatic.
If you are self accepting you will allow yourself to know when you have made an error and you will simply correct it- not much drama and a lot of forward momentum. You will also be free to celebrate success.
If you are not self accepting you will accept drama, negativity and repeat patterns and strategies of survival rather than success. This would be because the nervous system is confident that it can make it through survival situations since it has done it before.
The success situations seem foreign and odd when they should feel comfortable.
Can you become comfortable with forward progress? Can it feel normal? Can you close your mind to unwanted routines in favor of productive routines?
A lot of the time we either see things falsely to create our excuse or we keep people around who are not the best for us to create an excuse. We must be able to be comfortably to blame ourselves and still like ourselves to avoid being false in our perception or keeping the wrong routines or relationships for us.
Then we are free to enjoy the world as it is and ourselves as we are…improve what we wish, and share life with others.